Born to an American mother and African father, actress Gabourey Sidibe who became screen favorite across the world for her breakthrough role in the movie ‘Precious’.

She detailed her troubled past life having to deal with issues in the family from the divorce that hit her parents just a year after they got married. Her father convinced her mother to marry him to speed up his process of getting a green card in order to stay together forever but things did not go as planned after the marriage. And, the abuse from her father was too much for the family to handle, hence, the decision for the break up.

Launching her memoire, ‘This is Just My Face; Try Not to Stare’ which is an autobiography deploying every problem she ever went through with abusive words thrown at her over her body size and suffering serious depression and bulimia in the process. She couldn’t express and explain to people how depressed she had become not even to her mother because she wouldn’t believe her and will always ask her to have faith and be strong and not allow life’s trouble break her down.

According to her, life has it own way of dealing with situations around us but opening up to people you trust about your problems and sharing ideas can her help solve few percentage out of them which was something difficult for her to do but, she finally gathered courage and spoke to a therapist who helped her overcame her sadness and release the joy in her.

In the process of finding solution to her depression, she explained how she stopped eating just to avoid the frequent panic attacks.

‘Often, when I was too sad to stop crying, I drank a glass of water and ate a slice of bread, and then I threw it up, she writes ‘After I did, I wasn’t as sad anymore; I finally relaxed. So I never ate anything, until I wanted to throw up – and only when I did could I distract myself from whatever thought was swirling around my head, she added.

‘I found a doctor and told her everything that was wrong with me. I’d never run down the entire list before, but as I heard myself, I could sense that dealing with this on my own was definitely no longer an option.

‘The doctor asked me if I wanted to kill myself. I said, “Meh, not yet. But when I do, I know how I’ll do it.” I wasn’t afraid to die, and if there was a button I could’ve pushed to erase my existence from earth, I would have pushed it because it would have been easier and less messy than offing myself. According to the doctor, that was enough.’

Before landing her role in the movie ‘Precious’ and then ‘Empire’ series to becoming the star she is today, she had worked as a phone sex operator, a job she had no knowledge about but had to do it to foot the bills. The job was such that, your money increases with duration of the call so you have to convince the caller to stay and talk with you for long.

You can check out the book here: This Is Just My Face: Try Not to Stare

Image Credit: Houghton Harcourt and Getty Image

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