Loneliness is one of the things we have to overcome as individuals. It has led many people into unwanted, abusive and draining relationships.
I cannot count how many bad relationships I got myself into. In all fairness, I cannot give you the number of people that got themselves into bad relationships with me.
I had a few relationships where people used me for things I had. I remember one incident when I got home and found my wardrobe cleaned out by a guy I hardly knew. I also remember a girl I brought back to the house, who ended up stealing my money. That was funny because there was nobody else in the house but she denied it when I asked her.
The worst has to be the relationships that led to me being hijacked and almost killed.
I remember moving to a remote town for my spiritual journey. We had a house there and because of the state of my life at the time, living alone was best for me so I could find myself. It was a peaceful and beautiful mountainous area with a dam. Most of it’s residents are rich and elderly who retired there for the calm, breezy boat-life. In other words, a very boring town to live in if you are a youthful person but also an awesome place to vacation and get away from city-life.
What ended up happening in those first few weeks though was, each day I was meant to work on myself, I’d find myself driving out because I was bored and needed to interact with people. One of the reasons I left the city was because of the reckless lifestyle I lived, but because of my inability to be alone, I gravitated to likeminded people and found the noise I was running away from, in a place where I was seeking quiet and growth.
I lost focus of my objective and started making friends with people I did not care to screen because their company took me out of a place of loneliness.
Through my journey I learned that many have stayed in bad relationships because of their inability to be alone.
When they do finally get the courage to leave that toxic relationship, loneliness demands that they jump into another relationship with all the unattended wounds that desperately need healing. This only increases the chances of adding another failed relationship to the list because we have been conditioned to point fingers and blame others for what happens in our lives, robbing us of every opportunity to look into ourselves.
How many toxic relationships have you been in because of loneliness? It really doesn’t matter whether they are friendships or romantic, if they are toxic, they essentially take away from you the ability to grow as a man. Generally we are not forced into these relationships so why do we end up in them?
Photo credits: Online For Love
Follow Glam Africa on social media: @GLAMAFRICAMAG